Facts About Queers

FACT: Queers are the only people in the world who can properly process the color pink.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 17:15:56 -0500

If a group of seven or more queers hold hands, a rainbow ray of glitter will grant them access to the mystical queer wonderland on Pluto.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 15:52:33 -0500

FACT: the demisexual was patented by an obscure Welsh engineer in 1956. Until recently, every demisexual in existence was assembled by hand in a shed in Bangor.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 14:39:00 -0500

FACT: If a queer doesn't wash their hair in at least three days, a sparkly confetti-like substance will then start falling from their hair.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 13:18:52 -0500

FACT: All closeted Queer people and their closets have a symbiotic relationship much like clown fish and anemone.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Sun, 29 Jul 2012 18:36:39 -0500

The closet protects the Queer, and the Queer in question secretes a slimy substance that can only be seen by other queers; the substance is made of fabulousness and glitter.

FACT: All Queers are able to be revived from death via mucosal exchange.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Sun, 29 Jul 2012 17:13:01 -0500

FACT: Every queer can turn into a chibi version of themselves at will.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Sun, 29 Jul 2012 15:46:53 -0500

FACT: Genderqueer people are universally known as the world's best "Mariokart" players.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Sun, 29 Jul 2012 14:37:10 -0500

FACT: All queers are naturally better at roller skating than non queer individuals.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Sun, 29 Jul 2012 13:07:11 -0500

FACT: Bisexuals are extremely good at magic. Many become magicians so that they can use magic without suspicion.

lilalovespeaches-deactivated201 — Sat, 28 Jul 2012 18:38:01 -0500

FACT: On the night of their birth each Queer Goth is granted one (1) Unicorn Pillow Pet. Said Unicorn will serve as their life guide and accompany them through the darkest of times.

pandylynn — Thu, 14 Jun 2012 11:38:24 -0500

FACT: Trans women fucking love pickles.

633nm — Wed, 13 Jun 2012 18:19:26 -0500

FACT: if a gay man and a gay woman get drunk enough when in a club between the hours of 1 am - 3:30 am, a statue of them dancing together will appear outside their house at exactly 11:36 am

crocsthemusical — Wed, 13 Jun 2012 16:32:09 -0500

Usually the statue will have at least one branded bottle of vodka in one person’s hand

FACT: All lesbians have a strawberry jam filling.

Wed, 13 Jun 2012 15:02:12 -0500

FACT: If a lesbian is trying to court a bisexual woman, she will lay her head on her lap and start purring like a cat.

airsofgrace — Wed, 13 Jun 2012 13:20:04 -0500

If the bisexual chooses her as her mate, she will braid ribbons into the lesbian’s hair, no matter how short. This feat can only be accomplished by bisexual women. This is also why bisexual women always carry ribbon with them at all times.

FACT: Queer folk can see people in varying degrees of transparency, like layers in Photoshop. Pansexual people show up in hyper focus and over-saturated. Asexual spectrum folk look like jpeg artifacts.

sometimescoherent — Wed, 13 Jun 2012 11:34:46 -0500

FACT: Lesbians always forget to write thank-you notes and must be reminded.

apopelectric-deactivated2012092 — Tue, 12 Jun 2012 18:19:52 -0500

FACT: Biromantics cannot be left alone in stationary shops in case they get overwhelmed.

potentialcrumpets — Tue, 12 Jun 2012 16:37:49 -0500

FACT: When a demiromantic falls in love, the object of their affection develops a sudden and inexplicable craving for cranberry juice.

queenieofaces — Tue, 12 Jun 2012 15:00:36 -0500

Upon reciprocation of feelings, the craving will fade so that it can be quenched with cranapple.

FACT: Not only is Sappho the original lesbian, she is immortal. Sappho never dies. She simply changes her appearance every 90 years or so.

alimonight — Tue, 12 Jun 2012 13:14:37 -0500